Saying No

I read that a CEO, when asked what the toughest part of his job was, responded, “saying no to close friends.” Saying “no” can be one of the more difficult things to do in life generally, but it is fundamentally critical to success for in-house attorneys. Conversely, no law division wants to be known as the “Department of No.” This dynamic requires lawyers to learn to say no in as constructive a fashion as possible.

I always say that we don’t owe clients or customers agreement with what they are saying, but we do owe them an explanation and an exploration of alternatives. Along the same lines, Steve Reynolds, General Counsel of Alcatel-Lucent, fashioned a mantra of “no… because… but” for his law department. By that he meant if one must say “no” to a particular idea, one should explain the “because” behind the “no,” and then add “but have you considered this alternative...” To me this is an exemplary approach.

Too many promiscuous “yes’s” can lead to a different sort of trouble. If a client, customer, vendor, or peer does get a “yes” from you on a meaningful issue, they should feel like they earned something of value and it should not be given too cheaply.

Most difficult of all, is to say “no” to yourself; but those no’s can be the most important of all, particularly when arranging your priorities. It’s as tempting for individuals as it is for corporations to put everything on a master “to do” list, but your “to don’t” list is just as crucial. You will be filled with many great ideas on how to change your department, your company and even the world, but your energies will be too diffuse without ruthless prioritization.